Below, in f/u to B’s text
J
———
Kudos for your efforts.
Not sure, though, what googledoc deltas actions/ delta/outcomes to xpx.
Ma’s in control — a little less large– but still fully in-charge. The state of Maryland considers her a competent citizen in charge of her own affairs.
Family-wise she’s proven willing to have her cake & eat it, too. Ready to plague all family time w her woes. She accepts zero accountability to listen, act, experiment, try anybody else’s ideas.
Cake/Too.
You unburden yourself on friend or family, you opened a 2-way conversation. That right comes w responsibilities. Paid professional, that’s different.
My efforts, known and unknown to siblings, to just lead that horse to water came to worse than nought. I was the bully. Ma the Horse proved she ain’t gonna drink no water not of her own making.
Like any rubbernecker, I quit. Now Ma has H status for me.
I’ll be present, available, but initiative, influence, expectations, problem-solving, are past, failed, relics.
Alt approaches:
– Es mother died at 63 of cancer. The kids were not involved. She kept riding her horse and would pivot every conversation to the grandkids.
– Both GI Joe’s parents died last fall. Neither finances nor health matters were shared w the kids.
Ma’s responsible for her present state of play. Legally, perhaps even rightly, we have no say.
Last Sunday we took Popeyes to Boones. Ma started a litany of her maladies. She shared her refusal to wear compression socks, I asked
“Why would you not try everything possible?”
“I’m bi-polar, I don’t do such things.”
She declined all dates for surgery until 22 September. Man, I just bit my tongue on the obvious begging question. I did say to Ma & Pete:
“I’m just sad that we as a family we have failed to rally effectively.”
We can’t save her from herself.
We can’t do so anymore than she could adolescents us.
Nor us our own devil-spawn.
Cuidado, hermano
Rubbernecker J