The day the gelato died

The day the gelato died …😓

   … It is Friday 13

   … the insult, the injury 

   … Classic waitress flim-flam.    Shameless, she didn’t  cop to the substitution of ice cream for gelato. 

We’ll have “The Gelato Trio.”

   “Yes.  We have new flavors, honey-graham, bourbon vanilla and summer strawberry. “

“I know gelato and those are no gelato.  Impostors all.”

   My probing relentless interrogatory exposed the carefully-concealed truth:

         “Waitaminute, did you just say ice cream?”

     When I balked, she offered up pecan pie cheesecake …

   “You have some nerve, missy.  Keep your ice cream and your peasants’ pecan pie. Check please.”

   … then me-head-down-on-table, waitress regales us with account of her best-most-amazing-ever gelato experience !!!

         “Thank you for that.”

   … un-distressed gentlefolk sat and dined and laughed around us as if the modern world hadn’t collapsed

   … quick map recon verified my hypot that columbia MD, aka Retail Heaven, now has no gelato reserves. Gotta drive to Fells Point or surprisingly enough, Catons-fucking-vile for gelato. 

   … now home at Mayfoo, I remain staunchly inconsolable

    … there is no upside, silver-lining to this day the gelato died

    … and it’s 13 Friday, not 1 April, I shit you not. 

    I won’t awake from my beauty sleep and say 

        “Whew. That was a close call.” 


I’ve lost my gelato, et al.”

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